Systemized discouragement of free-will of women

The main reason is not of lust but of control, with a misogynist mentality to keep the women in place which stems from the religious misperception that Eve was born out of Adam, hence her sole purpose was to serve  men, a common belief to endorse in a patriarchal society whose brunt, even the most successful women face at their workplace, no matter how senior their position is

Pakistan is a land of diversities with many lifestyles, customs and traditions stemming from the ancient agrarian roots  which have remained an integral and an inseparable essence which forms the  psyche of human mind that cannot escape the notion of prestige and honor deeply internalized into our mainstream societal thought, except for a small fraction of corporate and industrialized segments who represent a tiny fraction of economic change and evolved lifestyle.  But the attitudes had never been able to change , which now seems encoded in genetic makeup successively transmitted through generations since time immemorial. The stringent traditional honor is more profoundly found in rural Pakistan than the urban populations, but it must be kept in mind that most of the populations in urban regions originally comprise of   rural populations, most of which have remained under the control of their powerful landlords, hence their subjects remain under subliminal obedience of the codes of conduct and obedience. Like religious obedience, no one dares challenging their authoritarianism,  and even if they do, very such precedents  have been set in many cases where some managed to break their chains, but others had not been lucky. In all this background, that ones to be exploited and suffered the most, whether in their consciousness or not, are the women who silently endure the brunt of reward-less labor , and have been aggressively denied to use their right to consent.  If they rebel, they are brutally silenced to set as an example for other women. The motive behind these gruesome acts is to keep the property within the family or settle disputes by forcing them into marriages, often underage girls, without their consent. Marriage is like sex slavery if consent is not taken from the girl which is rape clear terms. It is noteworthy to mention that this was perhaps the main reason why the bills tabled at the Parliament by previous governments favoring women protection and against their domestic abuse was vehemently opposed by the rightist parties by calling it “westernization”. Progressiveness of women, especially in the south, is least tolerated. Most horrific is the fact that they discourage women from attending schools and have  been left deserted. Those who dare to go and secure more marks than male counterparts get grossly treated by the powerful, often by using tool of rape to discourage them from further progressing.

Now coming to the other side of free-will, sex, because of preconceived religious and societal standards, is considered legally  as rape here, which is ironical because this is occurring between two adults consenting to each other and are not harming one another, which is quite opposite to when no legal action is taken against child marriages and perverted customs like “bacha bazi” found commonly in some tribal areas.

Many modern couples have adopted the lifestyles of co-habitation for practical reasons which is their personal right to which no law or system should interfere unless there is rape and exploitation involved--without blaming the victim but the perpetrator of the crime.  Laws should be made as such so no woman feels threatened or intimidated for reporting crime against her.

It is also important to note that people in upper Punjab and northern areas where there is lesser influence of landowners are more liberal and their women are more progressive as they are allowed a voice in decision making. All this is deeply related with the freedom of women who are privileged enough to be allowed within the current system they belong to regionally.

But they are easily ridiculed, victimized and even faced with death if they try to break the chain of system against which they protest for being too oppressive to allow  their free-will.

In this, it is important to mention that liberties of consent for women are highly segmented into their class structure, especially when it comes to matters of love and sexual freedom, though many sadly keep it concealed for fear of punishment and social embarrassments. The upper elite class, except for major industrial and political influentials, and the rural structures are mainly respondents to their land's customary  laws based on “Biradri” endorsements, whereas, the middle-class, which constitutes the most part of urban societies is bound by rules of religiosity, which all in aggregation,  provide a different angle to matters of sex and taboos.

Women falling below poverty line, according to surveys, are engaged in prostitution to support the families and themselves as there are no other sources of income they can sustain.   Same goes to the once matriarchal red-light areas like Heera Mandi, which have now been taken over by the middlemen who exploit them and keep a major portion of their hard earned money to themselves.  Worst, they can’t even approach the doors of courts for their redressal of  grievances of exploitation as they fear repercussion of reporting rape, which they frequently suffer without protection in the business that is considered illegal, nor are they allowed to leave this tradition at will because of heavy intimidation from their dealers and lack of their rehabilitation into mainstream society, despite the fact that many managed to struggle to move away and seek admissions in educational institutions, but their attempts fail because of the societal taboos involved which don’t even care for their academic credentials.

Likewise, the Hari women are also very easy victims of rape by the influential and their big landlords for the fear of them breaking the chain of serfdom and bonded slavery by going outside the village. They are kept chained mainly. The worst to suffer are the non-muslim women who are kidnapped, converted to Islam and forced to marry without will and are then sent away across the borders in human smuggling. The case of Rinkle Kumari is still fresh in our minds, and no follow-up story had ever been taken into account since.

The main reason is not of lust but of control, with a misogynist mentality to keep the women in place which stems from the religious misperception that Eve was born out of Adam, hence her sole purpose was to serve  men, a common belief to endorse in a patriarchal society whose brunt, even the most successful women face at their workplace, no matter how senior their position is. This mentality totally goes against the mysticism of Sufi spirit that teaches us the lesson of deep love. But the society has never been able to grasp how the great spirits struggled to break free from the feudal taboos and laid their lives in sacrifice for considering their soul mates as their equals, not as their subordinates. Their examples of free love is a reflection of God Himself which is of respect and harmony, but such is tragically deplored in our current set-ups, despite many of their disciples who are looked down upon by the orthodox for considering their devoutness to love as Shirk and criticizing their respect of what these saints were preaching which is exactly the opposite of oppressive status-quo, in case of women following their free-will, be it for marriage, education or any other aspiration that requires her own decision which, unfortunately, is considered forbidden in this society.