Telepathy with Malala Yousufzai

Translated, from Pashto, by Arbab Daud

My Sweet Malala!

What happened, my dear?

Dear Lala, I was shot

Powerful mustached men shot me

They were sons of Khushal Baba!

Ney! They are not real sons of Khushal and Rahman Baba

Oh yes, I just remembered

I was shot by the devotees of Islam

I was shot by the lovers of Havens

But what was my crime, my sweet Lala?

My killing, my burying alive stopped with the advent of Islam!

I was given hereditary powers with introduction of Islam!

Malala oh my sweet Malala, why did you forget?

Didn’t I tell you to keep a mum?

Didn’t I guide you to stop asking of A, B, C?

Didn’t I order you to not ask for change and development?

Didn’t I ask you to avoid voicing for your rights?

But the Quran tells us “Rabbi Zidni Ilma”

I read numerous Hadiths of the Holy Prophet

But failed to find a place where men and women are refrained from learning

Then why are the faithful thirsty of my blood?

As if they are hunting down Obama or Bush

As if they are following Panetta or General Musharaf

Oh Malala my child, you forgot my advice once more!

You blanked out my guidance!

The Islam you talked about is mine and yours

It is the Islam brought to us by our Holy Prophet

But my dear Lala, what’s the difference between our and their Islam?

My dear, it’s Mullah Fazlo’s, Qazi Trader’s, Mullah Hamido’s and Maulana Sami-ul-Haq’s Islam,

Dear Lala, I recognized some of the names,

But why did you mentioned Sami-ul-Haq’s name with such honor

Don’t you know Maulana Diesel?

Aren’t you cognizant of Raheela Qazi’s father, haven’t you seen Saba Gul’s father?

Ah I know Maulana Diesel!

Raheela Qazi! (after a ponder) Yes I know that talkative parliamentarian!

Saba Gul is the owner of a big business and she is beautiful too.

I saw her in Jang newspaper with her silky long locks lying wide open

Yes my child, now you understand! (Laughing out loud)

But, why I took Sami-ul-Haq’s name with honor is a bad question to ask!

If I don’t honor him, then my one-eyed leader, the chief fighter,

The chief contractor of Islam shall hang me

Or will chop my head off!

You will lose your only Lala,

You will lose the one who will weep for you!

But my sweet Lala, you never stood for Malala,

I mean the one from Maiwand! Didn’t she win the battle for you?

Now you praise yourself that Britons never ruled you

Wasn’t it because of Malala from Maiwand?

My Dear Lala, you must tell me that why did you stood up with Malala from Maiwand

But left Malala Yousufzai to be shot in the head?

Tell me? Why are you silent now!

Malala! (Exasperatedly) why are you so smart! Why, tell me why?

Okay now listen!

In the times of Malala from Maiwand, there was not Mullah Fazlo

Neither Mullah Hamido nor Taliban Khan!

There were only simple Afghans, simple Afghans

With less knowledge of the religion

They didn’t know of Deoband and never ate any charity food in Akora Khattak

Okay Lala! Now the times have changes (beamishly)

Now people are Muslims, they have studied in Madrassahs! (Laughing)

Then I must go! This place is not meant for me!

I ask for light, I want Allah, I need everything that is written in the Book

They would never accept it, my sweet Lala!

Pray for me, but not for my life, let me go!

My Malala, the moment I learned that you were injured,

I prayed that Allah must take you away,

You must vanish from the face of earth,

Because we are dumb people,

We don’t deserve your bright smile, your shining eyes, your unique valor

We are weak-hearted,

What if they cut off our hands or feet?

We would still be alive

What if our conscience is dead, our bodies are breathing?

My dear Lala, I am leaving! But remember one thing

I would never leave these people (With a broad smile)

If in the name of Malala from Maiwand, Malala Yousufzai came into being

In the name of Malala Yousufzai many more crazy Malalas would come to this earth

Oh Lala! Tell me the truth,

Didn’t you just promised yourself in your heart

That you will turn Wranga, Hassasa, Nazuk Khyala

And the little mischievous Sanga into Malala Yousufzai

Tell the truth!

Isn’t it so?

What should I do my dear Malala!

Your Lala is not that brave,

But when I look at you,

I know I am coward, mean and dastard

But I would not let Wranga, Hassasa, Nazuk Khyala and Sanga

To be like me

No! Lala your daughters would become Malala,

And not the one from Maiwand but Yousufzai Malala!

Now Lala, may Allah be with you,

Now the so-called prideful men can turn their mustaches high!

Now the Mullahs can keep on eating their charities!

My comrades are coming!

A storm is on its way!

The change must come

May God be with you, Bye!!!!!!!